July 31, 2006

Coke: And Growing

New Advertising Campaign for Coke Coke: #1 Soft Drink in the World. Next goal: Replace Water. Cut to people swimming in pools of coke. To people taking showers in coke. To kids using drinking fountains at school that dispense coke. Fade out to moon eye's view of Earth. Oceans replaced with Coke... Fade back in to person next to a regular pool drinking a refreshing coke. Ok, we'll stick to soda. Coke: #1 Soft Drink in the World.
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July 27, 2006

Pre-Natal Care

So, most modern day women stop smoking and drinking when they get pregnant right? But, since you don't find out that you're pregnant until the month after you get pregnant, a smoker or drinker could be causing serious harm to their child without even realizing it, when they would definitely have quit if they had known that they were currently pregnant. Is smoking and drinking while pregnant as dangerous as the after-school specials would have us believe? If so, don't women have a moral obligation to not drink or smoke at all when in a sexual relationship?
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July 26, 2006

Shoplifting Acquittal of CrazyGlue

"Andrea Yates was found not guilty by reason of insanity Wednesday in her second murder trial for the bathtub drownings of her young children." Here's my problem with this. Of course she's insane. Is there ever going to be a SANE reason for drowning your children? But, now this means that we're only going to punish the murderers who have good reasons for their crimes. But, the really crazy stuff? No, they shouldn't be punished. They're just crazy.
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July 26, 2006

Zoos are Animal Slave Houses

I don't understand why animal rights activists all own pets? They want to free Willy, save the polar bears, castrate puppies, but yet, they all imprison large collections of animals in their small homes. Were there any animals actually created for domestication purposes? It seems really mean, now that I think about it. I mean, I know we like touching animals. But, to keep one trapped in a human prison merely for our own entertainment? Perhaps farmers in the mid 1800s in the South just really had an affinity for Africans?
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July 25, 2006

United We Speed

So, we are divided once again politically as a nation. One party thinking that the group, Hezbollah are terrorists, the other thinking that they are Santa Clause. I received inspiration today for a new political party to unite this nation. A few days ago, I was driving down the highway and a vehicle coming the other way flashed his lights at me (in the middle of the day). I had forgotten about this "secret code" to warn that there is a police cruiser in hiding down the road. I slowed down my vehicle and sure enough, there it was. This morning, I got to spot the cruiser first and gave people coming in the opposite direction the "secret code" and I saw their brake lights go on in my rear-view mirror. We as civilians are winning! The new party is "We hate cops!" Think of the campaign smearing. We can yell at their spending, we can go the whole donut route if we need to, we can point out the fact that crime still exists, proving their total and utter failure, it's a lock. We will be united once again!
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July 25, 2006

Anatomically Perfect Soul Mates

You know those stories about the young couple who falls in love and then the guy gets shipped off to war, and then find each other 40 years later in some random third world country in some random city in some random restaurant. To me, that's always a sign that there are such things as soul-mates in this world that are ordained by the Creator. So, I'm curious about something. If these soul-mates are "perfect" for each other. And the Creator knew in advance that these two people were destined for each other, might they also be anatomically created to match? And if research showed this, couldn't we then determine whether or not we should marry Girl "X" or Guy "Y" based on this? Let's turn love into simplistic soul-mate science people.
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July 21, 2006

Save the Animals, Nuke the Rest

This past week during the Israel-Hezbollah conflict, I have been noticing quite a few front page stories on Barbaro, the horse who broke his leg during the Preakness Stakes, one of the three races of the Triple Crown. When I mentioned how silly this was that a horse was incurring such large headlines during such a catastrophic time in the Middle East, my mother overheard me talking about Barbaro and yelled "Oh no, did he die?" Why would we care if Barbaro died? What is the better alternative for Barbaro, dying later? Why do we care more about animals than humans? Why do people see a limping dog walking down the street and start to tear up, but walk past a homeless person and think they deserve it?
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July 20, 2006

Give Up Your Body

Stem cell research is back on the front page again. I heard a very good point on television the other day by a leading doctor in favor of federal stem cell research. He claimed that it is crazy for people to deny access to embryo destruction because of the amazing good it can do for SO many lives. Without deep scrutiny into what an "embryo" is, couldn't one make the claim that this man should then voluntarily give up his OWN life because of the blood, organs AND stem cells that he could provide that would do good for EVEN MORE lives? Is this a fair question?
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July 13, 2006

Leopard Print Pucker Up

So, there are a lot of people who fancy women wearing leopard print clothing? Does this bother anyone else? They are attracted to people dressed up as animals! We are letting these people roam around our zoos! They're not there for the entertainment, they're speed-dating!
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July 13, 2006

Bigger Than Global Warming

One man-made occurence that seems to always flys real low under the radar is gravity. In the year 1666, (coincidence anyone), Isaac Newton invented gravity. No big deal, right? Wrong says flood rains and short basketball players. Without gravity, nearly all of the world's problems would be solved. The solutions are fairly self-explanatory. But, why do we settle for this gravity-plagued reality we live in. It's obvious, big business. There's lot of money in sneakers and houses, all which require what? gravity.
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